Subtitled: The Art of True Connection
How many meetings have us wondering if anyone was even really listening?
We’ve all been there — the nods, the polite “oh reallys,” the glances at screens. Everyone’s acting like they’re listening, but no one’s really connecting.
That’s why this book really got my attention.
The authors, Christian van Nieuwerburgh and Robert Biswas-Deener, take the tired idea of “active listening” and turn it into a leadership superpower.
Think about the conversations which have given you so much energy, the ones which lit your fire, and moved not just you, but projects and whole organisations forward. What is it about THOSE types of conversations – that type of listening – that we can put into practice?
This book gives us those skills.
There are 3 internal skills (ones we do within ourselves):
– Noticing
– Quietness
– Accepting
And there are 3 external skills (ones we do with others):
– Acknowledge
– Question
– Interject
Yep, you heard that right – radical listening includes interjecting – a productive form of interrupting.
It can be that moment when you’re discussing an upcoming surprise retirement party and the soon-to-be-retiree walks in the room – that’s a much needed interjection! And it can also be to encourage someone’s idea or milestone with a ‘that’s great!’ or to point out a special phrase they just said.
This one happens in my coaching calls quite a bit – a client mentions off-hand something they noticed in a recent meeting, yet I’ll point to it as an important aspect with a quick interjection – did you catch what you just said there?
And that’s what I love about this book – these skills are what expensive coaching programs teach and yet here they are in an easy-to-read book with examples to follow and research to back it up.
These skills are learn-able, do-able and will absolutely give you a leg up on leadership.
Everyone wants to feel seen and heard – give that gift to your staff and watch the trust and loyalty grow. Projects with colleagues and collaborators will move more efficiently too. Listening – RADICAL listening – can do that.
The authors say it best:
Listening isn’t passive; it’s the most radical act of connection we can offer.
Because when people feel heard, they don’t just follow you — they trust you.
And trust? That’s what turns conversations into momentum.
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