The journey beyond yourself
Wow. This book has blown my mind! The concepts are really shifting my perspective around what goes on in my head and heart. They’ve already changed how I view my internal dialogue and I have a feeling this is something I’ll keep doing moving forward.
So what are these concepts? I think the title gives us a lovely teaser in using the word ‘untethered.’
Mr. Singer encourages us to view our ‘self’ as separate from our thoughts and emotions, to untether as it were, from the internal noise. The thoughts and feelings which are in us aren’t a true reflection of who we are. They capture and hold energy often leading to frustration, stress and turmoil.
But once we become aware of these thoughts and emotions as not defining us, we can start to just watch them. We can even, in time, just let them come and go without any stress at all. Can you imagine a life with no stress, no problems? As Mr. Singer points out, that’s entirely possible. We can go through events without any problems or stress, because really, we are the ones who create the problem and the stress. The way he explains this has helped me realize just how much of our daily turmoil is in our own hands.
It might be awhile before I’ve eliminated problems and stress, but I have been using his techniques to become more aware of my own internal noise. It’s been an amazing difference in my sleep and in my hour-to-hour state of mind. And that technique? To just start being aware of it. As soon as I notice my inner voice is talking, I think – oh look, there’s the inner voice. I’ll then remind myself that I am not my inner voice.
I’ll also do what I can to just let that initial dialogue move away. It’s less about stopping the thoughts and more about letting the thoughts move through. Experience them, then let them go. This is different than how I’ve handled my inner voice before… I’d catch myself saying negative things then berate myself for doing that. Which just creates more tension and stress. Now, I notice it. I remind myself that’s not me saying those things and let them move on.
So how does this help us in our work and career? I see this approach helping us move through our daily demands with much more ease. Think about all of the energy we spend thinking we should do this better or faster. Or we replay a work conversation we had earlier in the day over and over wishing we’d said this instead of that. These are all ruminations using a lot of mental and emotional power. And for what? Those thoughts won’t change the events. But when we can be more present in each moment instead of worrying, we’ll have more energy to put towards being our best self and doing our best work.
I do hope you seek out this book when you’re ready to quiet the inner voice, to free yourself from the thoughts that are holding you back. And when you do, please, let me know your takeaways?
